Sunday, October 27, 2013

"I am" a firefighter

I wanted to share this because I don't know who reads this that is a firefighter or who is not. I wrote this essay for a class, and I think you can tell the difference in my writing style. I would call that #englishmajorproblems. Not that it is a bad thing. Whoever reads this, I hope you appreciate either the writing style, the job, or the feelings I am trying to convey. I love being a firefighter.

I am a firefighter. I volunteer. I train and learn. I respond. You do not want to see me. If you see me, in all of my gear, it means today is not a good day for you. You do not know me, but you put your trust in me. I am supposed to make your day better. I do not wear a cape, but on some occasions, I am expected to save the day.
            I am a second generation firefighter, following in tradition, as often happens in this field. I am a firefighter, like my father before me. Everyone who wanted me to fail because I am another Mikulan or because I am a woman-you failed. I am a firefighter, like my father before me. As a child, my dad was serving as a volunteer fire chief. Despite the memory of the fear that my ten year old self felt on 9/11, believing that my father would have to go to New York for those raging fires and not return, I still joined as a junior firefighter when I was old enough. I never looked back. Being a firefighter is everything that I have ever wanted. It is not a job for everyone, but it is a job that you must truly love to do. At 14, you do not realize the scope of the risks you are inheriting. The years went by, and I developed as a firefighter. At least one night a week, my time was spent with classes and learning. On other occasions, I went out of my station to go elsewhere to train. Did I miss things? Yes. Were there times when my friends wanted to go out, and I would respond, “Sorry, I have drill.” Yes. Was it worth it? Yes. Even while away at college, there would be times I would miss out on with my friends because I would go home to go to a drill or fundraiser.
            Now I see myself and look back. I have responded to floods that devastated neighborhoods. I have spent the twilight of a Christmas morning at a structure fire. Just last year, when the clock struck midnight for the New Year, I was riding in the cab a fire truck, returning from another house fire. When I turned 16, I was old enough to become an emergency medical technician, and I did. The week after I finished my finals for my junior year, I obtained my Firefighter 1 Pro-Board, national certification. There have been times that I have struggled, but I always realize one thing: I am a firefighter. I do not see how anything could ever change that. Why else would I put so much time in training and fundraising? It is time consuming. Being a firefighter is not easy. While I may never be paid to do anything firefighting-related, I plan on continuing my career as a volunteer, hoping to achieve my Fire Instructor and Fire Officer certifications.
            It is hard being away from the department like I am while I attend college. I miss it. I miss the hard work that goes into it. Even when I am away, I still know that it is a part of me. I can imagine the smell of the turn-out gear, the weight of the air pack on my back, once extremely intimidating, now a solid reminder, or the feeling of that first breath of cool air when I connect my regulator into my face piece. Two of my brothers are firefighters too, when they tell me of calls or drills I have missed, I get jealous at times. I wish I was there with them, pulling lines, forcing doors, or setting up and climbing ladders to get access to the roof.
            I am a volunteer firefighter. I am the luckiest girl in the world. For every day that I can call myself a firefighter, I am thankful. This job can be hard, dirty, painful, disgusting, and frustrating. I have been bruised, cut, bloodied and strained by it. I am a walking contrast, a sorority girl with bows in my hair, taking out them or taking of my hoop earrings and throwing them in my locker as I get geared up to go on a run.  But I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. This job has made me stronger. It has forced me to grow, physically and mentally. Being a firefighter is a gift, not an obstacle.
 We ask a lot from the community, with all of the fundraisers we have. But believe me when I say that your support is necessary, valuable, and much appreciated. Firefighting is not cheap. Our gear and our apparatus cost thousands of dollars; all of it is costly. It can be expensive to save lives and sustain property. Know that for those donation letters we send or the tickets we try to sell, when we get those final numbers, it can be like a weight lifting off of our shoulders-for a moment. After one fundraiser is finished, we are already thinking about the next. Always, we have to be thinking ahead, whether it be fundraisers, planning training drills, and responding. Responding to emergencies always requires us to be ahead. Being a firefighter has changed my life.
            I am a firefighter. I am a part of something more. I am part of a brotherhood. It is nothing to me to call another firefighter my brother. I have never met a firefighter who did not truly love that job with all of their heart. You have to. There is no other way. We are our own culture. I can’t explain the bonds with my brothers and sisters, just know that I always have their backs. I understand that it is not normal to run into burning building when others are running out. It is not natural to run into danger. However, I see it as a job that someone has to do. I know that I am lucky to be a firefighter. I am living a dream. I am not a hero. I am a firefighter. I took this job knowing it wouldn’t be easy. I have struggled. But it has been worth it. If there ever comes a day that I am longer a member of a fire department, there will always be a part of me that would want to go back. Firefighting will always hold a place in my heart.
            The helmet weighs heavily on my head, but that’s okay. This job can have heavy meaning. The heavy weight is a reminder to always be prepared for whatever obstacles are thrown our way. In all of my gear, face mask on, breathing air from my SCBA, all you may know about me is that I am a firefighter, perhaps you may see the Mt. Troy shield on my helmet or V. Mikulan on my back. In that moment, it does not matter who I am, what matters is if I get the job done. All you know is that you need a firefighter to do something. I am a firefighter.


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